This Is Really Bad

Here is the link to FMG's post entitled, Manzo Mashup (A Record Day). Manzo loves to start off his sentences with "I mean" and FMG just ain't having it. So FMG lists off every "I mean" sentence Manzo wrote that day and follows it up with this:

On the day of the twenty fifth of May in the year of our lord two thousand and eleven, Pete Manzo heretofore officially started sentences with “I mean” 13 times in 5 blogs. THIRTEEN. That is a 260% rate. Unheard of. In one post Manzo started 3 out 4 sentences with “I mean”. In baseball terms Manzo is leading the league in BA OBP VORP HR BAA HBP WHIP and RISP. Dude just won the Octo-crown.

When asked about the record being broken, previous holder Cher Horowitz was quoted as saying “I mean, it’s like totally cool, ya know. I mean, donchya think?”

I mean, let's just get past the obvious question here of "Who gives a shit how many times Manzo says 'I mean?'" Let's talk about what the fuck FMG means when he says Manzo uses 'I mean' at a "260% rate". He's definitely in violation of some sort of algebraic law here. I mean, this doesn't indicate anything. First of all, a normal person would say Manzo used 'I mean' 2.6 times per blog, not at a "260% rate". Weirdo. Second of all, what's your point? I'm not going to go back and count but for argument's sake let's say that in those 5 blogs, Manzo wrote 45 sentences. I mean, that would mean that Manzo writes sentences at a rate of 900%. Outrageous!

Obviously inspired by his own use of a percentage, FMG is compelled to make a baseball analogy. And it's a really bizarre one. So Manzo's over-use of 'I mean' equates to leading the league in 5 offensive categories and 3 pitching categories? I mean, I know its some sort of sarcastic hyperbole thingy, but it really doesn't make any sense. Hey, at least you set yourself up to coin the term, "Octo-crown". That's some quality work right there.

Way to close it out with a Clueless (1995) reference. I mean, great movie. But ridiculously lame joke.

I think of all the FMG posts I have read this is far and away his worst. Actually, hang on let me check...so this is 1 blog and there were 9 sentences each one as unfunny as the one before it. So this blog sucked at a rate of 900%. So yeah, it's his worst one. 

If I'm being honest, I'm not too pleased with myself here either. I could have been a lot better.