Hey, Fire Manzo Guy, come out, come out wherever you are. Since May 24th you were putting out like 3 FireManzo posts per day, not counting the weekend and holiday. I started my nonsense on June 1st which is coincidentally the last day you wrote anything. Speaking of the last thing you wrote, let's take a look.
During game 1 of the NBA finals Manzo saw a Mario Lopez look-a-like and decided to tell the world about it.
The first picture and caption are Manzo's. The second picture and caption are FMG's and all of the other text is FMG's. My comments follow in bold at the end.
Another gem of a late night post for Manzo last night. While Pres was posting naked pics of Blake Lively Manzo decided to post up an absolute jaw dropper himself. Here is the pic Manzo put up with his headline:
Now AC Slater is a Heat Fan?
That seriously looks less like AC Slater than Manzo does…
Oh and the most important part of all this… Who would give a flying fuck if Slater is a Miami Heat fan? Shitballs Johnson the dudes real name is Mario Lopez, my first pick if I were ever forced to speculate on the subject of his basketball fancy would be the Miami god damn Heat. The key element to the look alike game is some presence of irony, there is zero irony in this, Slater should be a Heat fan. Namean cuz?
Is Manzo shooting for an Andy Kaufman type thing by going so far out of the comedic box that he thinks he might become funny? Is that it? Is it? Someone please tell me what the hell is going on here before I deepthroat my tailpipe, because I refuse to live in a world that allows Manzo to be a professional humorist.
Firstly, what passes as an acceptable look-a-like for FMG? A mirror picture of Blake Lively? This is not a bad call on Manzo's part. His headline is terrible though. It isn't blog worthy but if I had noticed this guy on TV I would have paused the TV and said to whoever I was watching it with, "Doesn't this guy look like AC Slater after he took a shower with the low-pressure shower head from Seinfeld" Uh-oh, Seinfeld reference! My first Manziarism! On second thought, I guess it is partly blog worthy because if I had made the same look-a-like call and then saw it on Barstool too, I could say, "See, Barstool thinks it looks like Slater!" I would just rather it was any one else than Manzo that proved my point.
The rest of what FMG says here is just more examples of him making shit up to prove his point. "The key element to the look-a-like game is some presence of irony". I have to respectfully disagree and say that the key element to the look-a-like game is that the two people in question FUCKING LOOK LIKE EACH OTHER. Seriously, who has ever heard that the key element to the look-a-like game is a presence of irony?
Two friends are at Fenway for a Sox/Tigers game (3 years ago, before Sparky Anderson died):
Friend 1: Hey, doesn't that guy two rows back look like Sparky Anderson?
Friend 2: Eh. I don't know. Kind of I guess, but Sparky Anderson might actually go to a Tigers game. Not ironic enough.
Friend 1: You're right. How about Jack Kervorkian?
Friend 2: (Falls off his seat) HAHAHAHA! I'll give you that one, man. I mean, Kervorkian did live in Michigan and I'm pretty sure he loves baseball, but he suicided people.... So I'll give it to you! Good one.
Then FMG asks is Manzo going for an Andy Kaufman out-of-the-box type thing? By pointing out a look-a-like??
What the fuck, man? Seriously.
Shitballs Johnson! I gotta go to bed.
UPDATE: So I got home at 3am this morning and started to write this latest entry well before news broke of Jack Kevorkian's death. I actually wasn't 100% sure that Dr. K was still alive when I wrote it so I googled him to make sure. Because there's no way I was going to write a fictional dialogue scene with plot holes! And as of 3am this morning there was no news of his death. Then when I wake up today I see news that he died around 2:30am in Michigan. That would be 3:30am Boston time. The dude literally took his final breaths as I was typing a fictional dialogue that included him. And if you go back and re-read it, you can see that I inexplicably used the past tense when I say that he "did live" in Michigan followed by an immediate use of the present tense saying that "he loves" baseball. I also spelled his name incorrectly in my original post. What the fuck? Did I kill Dr. K? That is some real Stranger Than Fiction shit right there.
No comments:
Post a Comment